Monday 4th August 2008

Well I have officially been in hospital for 7 days and the walls are starting to close in on me a bit…Si returned to work so it was the first day that I spent completely on my own and the loneliness and isolation of being so far away from home really hit….in South Africa I would have had loads of visitors and my ward would have been full of flowers whereas here it is just little old me….family came to visit in the evening which was wonderful, but somehow an hour just isn’t enough.

Nicholas is doing well and his tube has been removed which makes feeding so much easier, he has been moved into my room today and although he is still on the billy bed it is lovely to have him with me – can’t wait to be able to have cuddle times with him as so far with his need for the lights and uninterrupted sleep it is literally a few minutes at a time over scoff and then back in his bed for peace and quiet.

When I was thinking about having another baby for all those years and people would ask me why I wanted another child, I could never give them any other answer then that I just knew that there was a soul in my life waiting to be born, and that is exactly how I feel about Nicholas, one huge bonus to so much “alone” time in hospital is that we have been able to bond, and I absolutely adore this precious little being that God has sent us to look after.


As for a 4th and final child, well lets just wait and see, the birth was to traumatic for me to even think about it now and I think it will take Simon at least a year to recover, but something in the bottom of my heart tells me that it will happen and then our family will be complete.