I have just given up feeding Nicholas and I am not entirely sure who is suffering more.....he is definitely more then a little confused as, up until now, he has been exclusively demand fed and if that meant 3 times in an hour then so be it and now the tap has been abruptly turned off as it were and he is reeling a little bit (his fault for refusing the bottle and holding out for the breast feeds).
I too am going though all kinds of angst, not only am I dealing with breasts from hell (sorry my male readers but my word, this is painful going cold turkey and without the use of drying up tablets) but my hormones are all over the place and I am back to crying at the death of animated dogs and turning on my husband in a rage one minute and kissing him the next - to say that Simon is confused is the understatement of the century and he even asked me if I thought I may be going mad the other day.....of course this was done with great trepidation and from behind the safety of a closed door in case I chose that moment to flip and throw something at him (lol), but it actually got me to thinking.
What is it with woman and hormones, they control us and turn us into strange beings at least once a months....if our hormones are out of wack so are we, I literally cannot think reasonably and the aggression is almost like a physical force in my stomach....I am now so desperate to get it under control that I am seriously thinking about speaking to the doctor about some kind of medication.....anything to restore some semblance of sanity, but preferably in the form of a patch or injection.
I don't think our diets help any either, most of the meat we eat has some kind of hormone in it and all the fruit and veg has been so irradiated or frozen or both that most of the vitamins and minerals are gone.....my biggest problem (and I can admit this) is that I can't remember to take the supplements that I have spent a fortune on in the past and so the cycle never gets broken and I find myself spiralling into a kind of frenzy for a week every month and then spending the rest of the month feeling alternately guilty about my behaviour and frustrated because I know it is going to happen again.....so why am I noticing it all now, and why am I suddenly determined to fix it?
Well I have had relatively stable hormone levels for the last 18 months and I liked it....no I LOVED it, I was able to enjoy my life, my children and my wonderful dh and if Nick didn't now have teeth I would seriously consider feeding for a considerable time still in order to maintain the balance.....so what now....well I am going to endeavour to get things under control and in the mean time hope that my dh and children don't give up on me entirely....I know they have also preferred the woman that has been living with them for the last 18 months and I will do just about anything at the moment to get her back.
9 comments:
OK girlfriend - me first !!!!
Firstly dont put too much pressure on yourself...after all you are the only one not getting a full nights sleep and working hard in the day plus being a mother to a little baby and two more plus a wife plus plus plus lets not forget the all important task of cooking and cleaning and laundry and entertaining and fetching and carrying and so on and so on.
You and Nick are both off the breast - it was easier for you to have breastfed than not to have - you are clearly in a whirlwind of emotions right now but the fact that you can actually see the wood for the trees is awesome....self analysis is always the best and the first step on the road to recovery - go talk to a doctor and get help - anything to stabalise the hormones....
if that fails call me i have a bottle of VODKA and two straws with our names on it!!!
if you get any good advice PLEASE let me know - welcome to my world!!! Can you not reduce the feeds to Nicholas? I can feel your pain, I cried when my babies wanted the breast and I had stop feeding, you surely can carry on feeding just at night? all the best.x
Hmmm yes - I remember considering a flight back to SA in desperation for those tablets.
You'r brave to go cold turkey - I buckled every time.
Wishing you strength - hormones should calm down in a week or two...
I seem to remember my two youngest ones wouldn't take milk from a bottle - they went straight for the baby juice. That was at about 20 -22 months old.
Oh right - it was rooibos tea with dash of baby milk or baby juice.
Hmmm, shame...I breastfed for 2 years then reduced it gradually so it wasn't so bad. Maybe you should feed less but still a bit if it's not too late? As for the hormones perhaps it's just 'cos of what's going on right now & will improve. I've just found out I have uterine fibroids that cause pms, etc to be worse so I am having an ablation. It's a new alternative to a hysterectomy where they burn off the lining of the uterus to a much thinner layer & it supposedly improves everything hormonally/physically/emotionally. Sounds too good to be true but am giving it a try!
Morning GF!
Ok well I can safely say that even without breastfeeding i am not immune to those outbursts and moments where I turn into the "Bride of Godzilla" - so I think it's safe to say even though our hormones are all out of sync for different reasons, but leave us with the same symptoms, so GF you are NOT ALONE.
The difference is being the control freak you are, you are now freaked out by being "out of control...giggle....the hair ....eish...I shudder to think...but seriously, don't they sell RESCUE in the UK?
HELLO MY FRIEND.HOPE YOU HAVE MANAGED TO FIND A SOLUTION B4 I ARRIVE IN EXACTLY 31 DAYS TIME.IF YOU WANT ME TO BRING YOU RESCUE,JUST SHOUT.SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE HAVING SUCH A HARD TIME.I DON'T HAVE ANY ADVICE AS I WAS NOT FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BREASTFEED TASHA WHEN SHE WAS BORN.
YOUR FRIENDS' COMMENTS WILL HOPEFULLY BE ABLE TO HELP YOU.WHATEVER,DON'T GIVE UP.
YOU ARE A STRONG PERSON & WILL GET OVER THIS LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE YOU HAVE BEFORE.
MISS YOU GUYS, SEE YOU REALLLLL SOON. MARY
Eish! You've put yourself under so much pressure to perfect!! Andy, dear friend, take it from someone who had the hormones from hell, I'd done it all and tried it all and the only solution for me after all the drugs, ablations and eventual hysterectomy, was to cut myself some slack! Take it easy on yourself, you're trying to be everything to everybody and while that is commendable, it's just not realistic. Give your body time to re-adjust after giving up breastfeeding (don't they have drugs there to dry up your milk because Dostinex is wonderful stuff!!) and wait to see how your hormones settle down. Go for a vitamin B jab, take time to be kind to yourself and make sure you get enough a bit more sleep. Thinking of you and wishing you calmness in the face of turmoil over which you have no control... X
Sorry no advice as I didn't suffer like that. Hope you get some relief soon.
Post a Comment