This week has been about mom and I spending some last minute quality time together....isn't it funny that she has been here for 2 months yet there is still so much that we want to do and say before she goes home. Nicholas has finally finished all his medical checkups and appointments and has been given a total all clear and declared "in perfect health", so now Mom can go home without stress and worry having stayed long enough to do exactly what she came here to do and see me through the birth and establishing of a routine.
I must be honest that having literally had my mom move in for the first two months has given me a much greater understanding, and in deed appreciation, for the Indian culture of having your family live with you in the early stages after childbirth, as western women, we are so determined to be independent and do it on our own that we are inclined to isolate ourselves and instead of asking for help we struggle on, often fighting post natal depression, and quite frankly we loose out on some of the experience.
What better than being able to focus on loving and nurturing your baby while someone near and dear to you takes care of you. I have really loved it all this time and it is in no small measure to my mom's presence and support....and of course the unsung hero in all of this has to be my dad - dad has been on his own in South Africa for the last 2 months and has literally given up my mom for mine and Nicholas's benefit, no small feat, and something I will forever be grateful for, to have been able to so enjoy this experience has been the greatest gift of all.
Friday, 26 September 2008
Tuesday, 23 September 2008
Nick Pics
Caught these this morning while Nick was enjoying some bonding time with his gran......finally a smile, a little out of focus, but beggars can't be choosers!!!!!
Monday, 22 September 2008
Abject Terror
Tonight while I was sitting in my room settling Nicholas, I began thinking about my mom's eminent departure, and the thought fills me with terror....how on earth am I going to cook, wash, iron, dust, clean, raise my two older children, handle homework and keep my husband happy all while meeting the ever increasing demands of my littlest, with Megan and Phillip I had Rose to handle the house and I only had to handle the family - I know that millions of women all over England are doing it, I just don't know how!
For the two months that my mom has been with us she has been the wind in our sails and the keel keeping our ship going in the right direction, with her help we haven't really felt the demands of our baby and now that she is going I think the true impact is going to hit us like an earthquake, without warning and wrecking absolute havoc, and I am absolutely terrified!
For the two months that my mom has been with us she has been the wind in our sails and the keel keeping our ship going in the right direction, with her help we haven't really felt the demands of our baby and now that she is going I think the true impact is going to hit us like an earthquake, without warning and wrecking absolute havoc, and I am absolutely terrified!
Sunday, 21 September 2008
Sunday 21st September 2008
What a lovely lovely day....the skies were once again blue, and while Phillip went off with Wayne to rugby practise the rest of the family headed out to Southwater for Megan's Cub raft race. What fun, Simon got involved with the building the raft and our girls team made a wonderful effort racing against all the boy teams - they even managed to win one of the relay races and it was wonderful to once again be amongst a group of screaming mothers, all we needed were yellow tshirts and I could have been back at a Hillcrest Primary School sports day.
After the race we collected Phil and headed out to Piltdown to a lovely homely pub which has a great kiddies area and nice wholesome home cooked food for a pub lunch - I drank my first 500mls of cider much to mom and Si's amusement and it was stunning to just sit and relax in the sunshine.
Tonight on the news we have heard that Thabo Mbeki has been forced to resign as president of South Africa, and I confess to feeling a deep concern that things are going to get bad there before they stabilise and I admit to more then a little worry for family and friends.....we are now so removed from the problems in SA and so caught up with the crumbling economy here that we don't give much thought to the politics on the other side of the world and tonight was a stark reminder that not all our loved ones are as safe as we perhaps are, something which leaves me feeling very sad when I think just how beautiful the country is and how much it has to offer.
After the race we collected Phil and headed out to Piltdown to a lovely homely pub which has a great kiddies area and nice wholesome home cooked food for a pub lunch - I drank my first 500mls of cider much to mom and Si's amusement and it was stunning to just sit and relax in the sunshine.
Tonight on the news we have heard that Thabo Mbeki has been forced to resign as president of South Africa, and I confess to feeling a deep concern that things are going to get bad there before they stabilise and I admit to more then a little worry for family and friends.....we are now so removed from the problems in SA and so caught up with the crumbling economy here that we don't give much thought to the politics on the other side of the world and tonight was a stark reminder that not all our loved ones are as safe as we perhaps are, something which leaves me feeling very sad when I think just how beautiful the country is and how much it has to offer.
Saturday, 20 September 2008
Saturday 20th September 2008
What magnificent weather today, the English have been predicting an Indian summer and they may be right, the last week has been truly lovely and it is so nice to be warm during the day and able to get our washing dry out on the new washing line that our neighbours Mark and Stephanie have given us.....oh how things have changed, if you had told me a year ago that getting a new washing line would give me such joy I would have laughed.
Mom woke up feeling a bit grim this morning, so while she spent some time in bed, Megan and I headed off to meet her new extra English teacher and Simon and Phillip headed into Haywards Heath to buy a new pair of football/rugby boots. Worked out very well and Phil came home as pleased as punch with his new shoes and Megan loves Sarah who will be working with her for the next 6 - 10 weeks in an attempt to finally sort out her reading and spelling issues for once and for all.
After returning home I had a little sleep on the couch with Nick and woke up craving simba chips (and no I am not pregnant again lol), so Mom and I decided to head for Uckfield to explore the little South African shop that we have been told is there. Uckfield is about 17kms from us and is a really really beautiful little town, we had great fun driving around the area and have decided to return next week to have a better look as it has definite settling possibilities for us if we find that the schools are worth while....anyway, enjoyed the SA shop and so much closer than the one in Newhaven, came home armed with yet another jar of Cross and Blackwell Mayo, some lovely peppermint crisp and chocolate logs, biltong, dry wors, niknaks and Sparberry juice....so the taste of home, and this time even Mom admitted to having missed those flavours as she has been here so long.
Tomorrow Phil is off to rugby training and Megs has a raft race with her cub troop so providing the weather holds it should be a lovely day outdoors for the whole family.
Mom woke up feeling a bit grim this morning, so while she spent some time in bed, Megan and I headed off to meet her new extra English teacher and Simon and Phillip headed into Haywards Heath to buy a new pair of football/rugby boots. Worked out very well and Phil came home as pleased as punch with his new shoes and Megan loves Sarah who will be working with her for the next 6 - 10 weeks in an attempt to finally sort out her reading and spelling issues for once and for all.
After returning home I had a little sleep on the couch with Nick and woke up craving simba chips (and no I am not pregnant again lol), so Mom and I decided to head for Uckfield to explore the little South African shop that we have been told is there. Uckfield is about 17kms from us and is a really really beautiful little town, we had great fun driving around the area and have decided to return next week to have a better look as it has definite settling possibilities for us if we find that the schools are worth while....anyway, enjoyed the SA shop and so much closer than the one in Newhaven, came home armed with yet another jar of Cross and Blackwell Mayo, some lovely peppermint crisp and chocolate logs, biltong, dry wors, niknaks and Sparberry juice....so the taste of home, and this time even Mom admitted to having missed those flavours as she has been here so long.
Tomorrow Phil is off to rugby training and Megs has a raft race with her cub troop so providing the weather holds it should be a lovely day outdoors for the whole family.
Nicholas Update 19th September 2008
Our precious baby boy is growing like a little weed and today was the first of his developmental checkups with our lovely gp Dr. Lawrence, and to use his words, Nicholas is doing brilliantly.
At the moment there don't seem to be any lags due to his prematurity and although he is a little slow to smile (only a handful a day and normally at Granny) that is more due to his serious nature then his development. His muscle tone is good and he is weight baring nicely on his little legs, his startle reflex is well established and he is able to track an item over his mid line, so all in all he is at present a normal 7 week old as opposed to a 3 week old as expected.
His weight is still climbing steadily and he is now 4.78kgs which is a gain of another 460 grams this week and puts him onto the 91st centile for boys - we have had to put the first set of new born clothes away and will be buying Huggies number 2 on the next shop as his little thighs are getting too big for the Huggies number 1. He has also grown in length quite considerably and now measures 54cm with a head circumference of 39.5cm. In fact today I had to take his new born insert out of his car seat as he is getting too tall for it and as he is really starting to gain good control over his head it is now time - quite an emotional moment I have to say, hard to believe that in little over a week he will already be two months old.
At the moment there don't seem to be any lags due to his prematurity and although he is a little slow to smile (only a handful a day and normally at Granny) that is more due to his serious nature then his development. His muscle tone is good and he is weight baring nicely on his little legs, his startle reflex is well established and he is able to track an item over his mid line, so all in all he is at present a normal 7 week old as opposed to a 3 week old as expected.
His weight is still climbing steadily and he is now 4.78kgs which is a gain of another 460 grams this week and puts him onto the 91st centile for boys - we have had to put the first set of new born clothes away and will be buying Huggies number 2 on the next shop as his little thighs are getting too big for the Huggies number 1. He has also grown in length quite considerably and now measures 54cm with a head circumference of 39.5cm. In fact today I had to take his new born insert out of his car seat as he is getting too tall for it and as he is really starting to gain good control over his head it is now time - quite an emotional moment I have to say, hard to believe that in little over a week he will already be two months old.
Thursday, 18 September 2008
Blossoming
Last night during a skype conversation with a dear friend, she commented on how the Robertson family has simply blossomed since we have been here, and I just love that thought.....we really have blossomed, not only has our family grown by one precious member, but each and every one of us has grown in wonderful and not always expected ways.
Megan has turned into a little English rose and has more friends here then she has ever had before, she has slimmed down tremendously and with a totally fresh start she seems to have finally "found" herself and the freedom and independance afforded her here has turned her into a mature and responsible little lady....and today (and I know I really shouldn't put this out there for public consumption, but in the interest of accurate fact keeping) she went off to school wearing a bra for the very first time - and the scary bit is that she could actually fill it out and it wasn't just for appearances (I only needed a bra at about 12 for heavens sake). It was a very bittersweet moment for me and I shudder to think how her precious father is going to react when he realises......our perfect beautiful baby girl is turning into a woman.
As for Phillip, well as I mentioned a few posts back, he has turned over a whole new forest never mind a new leaf and has just had himself nominated (by a teacher) and elected (by his peers) onto the student council at school for this next academic year - there are two children per year on the council and they are responsible for making decisions on behalf of the student body and act as a go between the headmistress and their classmates, a very responsible position - so to those teachers out there who never believed in or liked Phillip, see what he can do, and to those few who saw through all the bravado, thank you, your faith in him was not without merit.....Mrs Maclearnan, he has done you proud!!!!
As for Si and I, well our marriage has gone from stength to strength as we have had to turn into each other rather than to others for advice and support and both of us are more relaxed and spontaneous then ever before which is having a noticable impact on our children. I don't recommend immigration to all, and certainly not for the wrong reasons, but to us, as I have said so many times before I am starting to sound like a broken record this adventure has been the best thing ever!!!!
Megan has turned into a little English rose and has more friends here then she has ever had before, she has slimmed down tremendously and with a totally fresh start she seems to have finally "found" herself and the freedom and independance afforded her here has turned her into a mature and responsible little lady....and today (and I know I really shouldn't put this out there for public consumption, but in the interest of accurate fact keeping) she went off to school wearing a bra for the very first time - and the scary bit is that she could actually fill it out and it wasn't just for appearances (I only needed a bra at about 12 for heavens sake). It was a very bittersweet moment for me and I shudder to think how her precious father is going to react when he realises......our perfect beautiful baby girl is turning into a woman.
As for Phillip, well as I mentioned a few posts back, he has turned over a whole new forest never mind a new leaf and has just had himself nominated (by a teacher) and elected (by his peers) onto the student council at school for this next academic year - there are two children per year on the council and they are responsible for making decisions on behalf of the student body and act as a go between the headmistress and their classmates, a very responsible position - so to those teachers out there who never believed in or liked Phillip, see what he can do, and to those few who saw through all the bravado, thank you, your faith in him was not without merit.....Mrs Maclearnan, he has done you proud!!!!
As for Si and I, well our marriage has gone from stength to strength as we have had to turn into each other rather than to others for advice and support and both of us are more relaxed and spontaneous then ever before which is having a noticable impact on our children. I don't recommend immigration to all, and certainly not for the wrong reasons, but to us, as I have said so many times before I am starting to sound like a broken record this adventure has been the best thing ever!!!!
Wednesday 17th August 2008
My dear mom was blown away by three things today......things that she believes make living here worthwhile, despite the shockingly cold weather and rapidly declining economy.
1. I had to have my tyres change this morning as they were right through to the canvas and I hadn't even noticed (you can tell I don't have my dad around to nag me (lol)....well to cut a long story short we went into a local garage in Haywards Heath, and having examined the two front tyres the attendant there declared that they were in a dangerous condition, I asked if I could book the car in for them to be changed only to discover that they were already fully booked for the afternoon.....and this is where my mom's mind blowing part comes in......the young guy who served me declared that there was no way that he was allowing me to go out on the road again with my tyres in that condition and that he would change them for me personally during his lunch hour, and all this wonderful service with a lovely smile.
2. After having the tyres changed we made our way to Burgess Hill to the local Tesco's (much cheaper then Sainsburys and my new shopping spot) to do the weekly shopping, and as we parked (in huge extended "Mother and Child" parking I must add), a very nice lady approached us to let me know that my brake lights weren't working....mom was just blown away by how nice she was and the fact that she had bothered to go out of her way and follow us into the car park, watch were we had parked and then come over to let us know, she now believes me when I say how nice the English are.
3. Once we had finished our shopping and were putting the groceries through the till, I suddenly realised that I had forgotten to buy milk and expressed my dismay to my mom....."Never mind" says the cashier "I will get someone to go and get it for you" - well you could have knocked mom over with a feather......I mean someone to actually go and fetch shopping that you forgot, she was simply stunned (lol).
1. I had to have my tyres change this morning as they were right through to the canvas and I hadn't even noticed (you can tell I don't have my dad around to nag me (lol)....well to cut a long story short we went into a local garage in Haywards Heath, and having examined the two front tyres the attendant there declared that they were in a dangerous condition, I asked if I could book the car in for them to be changed only to discover that they were already fully booked for the afternoon.....and this is where my mom's mind blowing part comes in......the young guy who served me declared that there was no way that he was allowing me to go out on the road again with my tyres in that condition and that he would change them for me personally during his lunch hour, and all this wonderful service with a lovely smile.
2. After having the tyres changed we made our way to Burgess Hill to the local Tesco's (much cheaper then Sainsburys and my new shopping spot) to do the weekly shopping, and as we parked (in huge extended "Mother and Child" parking I must add), a very nice lady approached us to let me know that my brake lights weren't working....mom was just blown away by how nice she was and the fact that she had bothered to go out of her way and follow us into the car park, watch were we had parked and then come over to let us know, she now believes me when I say how nice the English are.
3. Once we had finished our shopping and were putting the groceries through the till, I suddenly realised that I had forgotten to buy milk and expressed my dismay to my mom....."Never mind" says the cashier "I will get someone to go and get it for you" - well you could have knocked mom over with a feather......I mean someone to actually go and fetch shopping that you forgot, she was simply stunned (lol).
Tuesday, 16 September 2008
Tuesday 16th September 2008
Tonight I miss my friends....not to say that I don't miss them every single day, but tonight the pain is worse and I would love to know that I was meeting the Bratz for coffee and muffins at the Beat in the morning and Vix for tea in the afternoon, followed by a braai on the deck at the Dolloways and a nice long Sunday morning with Mary.
Friends truly are the backbone of life and are definitely the family that you get to choose and given the opportunity to do it all over again I would choose to surround myself with exactly the same people....people that I can laugh and cry with and who are used to my quirky ways and just love me absolutely for who I am. I read a poem once about friendship and how each friend fills a different and equally special role in our lives and how God sends them to us at exactly the right moment.....well my special friends this is to you.
Beryldene, you are my soul sister and my person, the one I can solve the problems of the world with and who knows what I am thinking even before I do.....your presence in my life has been for a relatively short time, but the impact has been far reaching and more inspirational then you could ever imagine, your drive and determination never ceases to amaze me and your dedication as a mother is a source of awe every single day.
Linny, more then anything you are the christian in my life, the person who unknowingly has led me back to the church and strengthened my personal relationship with God. I look to you so often for laughter and advice and you never ever let me down. I know that our friendship will withstand the strains of distance and that we will grow old together as (to use your words) sisters from another mother
Tracy, you are simply my other half, as we are both only children you have become a sister to me in so many ways, and being apart is like missing a limb every single day....we have laughed together until it has hurt and we have cried together - your ability to pick yourself up and carry on through the most tremendous adversity never ceases to amaze me and I just know that you will continue to go from strength to strength.
Vix, my friend you have been my quiet strength in so many ways and at so many different times...I can't describe the gap in my life where our precious teas used to be and I so wish that our two little boys could have grown up together like our girls did.
Mary, we have known each other a long time, and I have come to count on the fact that you will always be there....your friendship is unchanging and never ending and is a source of strength and joy to me that I can never properly express.
Kerry, my forthright friend, the person who will always tell it like it is and who I never have to pretend around. Kerry you have been there for me many times and your presence has often felt like a lifesaver, you don't judge me and accept me totally for who I am.
Tanya, my oldest friend, time has done nothing to weaken our bond, you know things about me that others can only imagine and you have stuck by me through it all - our friendship has been tried and tested over the years, and has survived to come back stronger then ever....I am so grateful for this opportunity to be involved in each others day to day lives again and I just know that we will be friends forever.
So thank you to all my girlfriends (those named and those not)......I count myself a very lucky person to have you all in my life!
Friends truly are the backbone of life and are definitely the family that you get to choose and given the opportunity to do it all over again I would choose to surround myself with exactly the same people....people that I can laugh and cry with and who are used to my quirky ways and just love me absolutely for who I am. I read a poem once about friendship and how each friend fills a different and equally special role in our lives and how God sends them to us at exactly the right moment.....well my special friends this is to you.
Beryldene, you are my soul sister and my person, the one I can solve the problems of the world with and who knows what I am thinking even before I do.....your presence in my life has been for a relatively short time, but the impact has been far reaching and more inspirational then you could ever imagine, your drive and determination never ceases to amaze me and your dedication as a mother is a source of awe every single day.
Linny, more then anything you are the christian in my life, the person who unknowingly has led me back to the church and strengthened my personal relationship with God. I look to you so often for laughter and advice and you never ever let me down. I know that our friendship will withstand the strains of distance and that we will grow old together as (to use your words) sisters from another mother
Tracy, you are simply my other half, as we are both only children you have become a sister to me in so many ways, and being apart is like missing a limb every single day....we have laughed together until it has hurt and we have cried together - your ability to pick yourself up and carry on through the most tremendous adversity never ceases to amaze me and I just know that you will continue to go from strength to strength.
Vix, my friend you have been my quiet strength in so many ways and at so many different times...I can't describe the gap in my life where our precious teas used to be and I so wish that our two little boys could have grown up together like our girls did.
Mary, we have known each other a long time, and I have come to count on the fact that you will always be there....your friendship is unchanging and never ending and is a source of strength and joy to me that I can never properly express.
Kerry, my forthright friend, the person who will always tell it like it is and who I never have to pretend around. Kerry you have been there for me many times and your presence has often felt like a lifesaver, you don't judge me and accept me totally for who I am.
Tanya, my oldest friend, time has done nothing to weaken our bond, you know things about me that others can only imagine and you have stuck by me through it all - our friendship has been tried and tested over the years, and has survived to come back stronger then ever....I am so grateful for this opportunity to be involved in each others day to day lives again and I just know that we will be friends forever.
So thank you to all my girlfriends (those named and those not)......I count myself a very lucky person to have you all in my life!
Sunday, 14 September 2008
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